Week 11--Measuring the Cost

This week’s lesson was very insightful.  What are you willing to give up to be successful in your business?  How do you balance your family, work, and church?  What is most important, money, family, power? These are some of the questions I thought about as I studied this week.  I really liked what Randy Komisar said about balancing your life and career. He said that it is essential to stay ethical and never put yourself in a position where you can’t say no.  (Randy Komisar, video “Balancing Your Life and Your Career Successfully”)  There will be trade-offs so that you can have balance, so knowing what those trade-offs will be and being okay with them will help you be successful.  Having balance in your life will bring true happiness.

I also liked that in the article, “Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness”, it talks about losing yourself in a Hero’s journey.  To live this journey, you must 1) overcome challenges, 2) lose yourself in a relationship, 3) lose yourself in thanks and generosity, and 4) lose yourself through a connection with God.  Of these four steps, the one I want to work more on now is developing a greater sense of gratitude. One of the ideas in the article is to keep a journal of the positive reflections from the day. Think about and notice the small things that made you happy that day. I think that as I do this, I will soon realize that I have much to be grateful for. Another part of learning to be grateful, which I think goes hand in hand with a journal of reflection, is suppressing Negative Chatter.  I know that negative chatter is so destructive, yet, I have struggles keeping it out of my mind. I am harder on me than I am on anyone else. “It turns out that having a positive attitude does make a difference and can become a self-fulfilling prophecy.” (“Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness”, Acton Foundation, 2008) Positive thoughts go a long way in producing happiness.

Attitude On Money (Stephen W. Gibson, "Attitude on Money", Jan. 2017)

1.       What is your attitude toward money?

You can’t support your family, help others, or build the kingdom of God without money.  We have been taught to be self-reliant and part of that reliance is planning for the future. Saving money for the future is ideal and a good way to use your money.  Money is neither good or evil, its what you do with the money that makes it that way.

2.       How can your view of money affect the way you live?

My view of money can affect the way I live very positively.  As I use my money to support my family, help others, get an education, I am using my money positively.  I feel that as I seek for opportunities to gain money, I need to remember not to neglect my family.  Family is more important than being rich.

3.       What rules are recommended for prospering?

There are six rules to follow if you want to prosper.

• Rule 1: Seek the Lord and Have hope in Him
• Rule 2: Keep the commandments, that includes the temporal ones, tithing and fast offerings.
• Rule 3: Think about money and plan how you can become self-reliant.
• Rule 4: Take advantage of chances for learning so you will not be ignorant of these matters.  Education, as President Hinckley has taught us, is the Key to Opportunity
• Rule 5: Learn the laws upon which the blessings of wealth are predicated.
• Rule 6: Do not send away the naked, the hungry, the thirsty, or the sick or those who are held captive.

I think that if we follow these six rules, we will use our money for good. We may not be the wealthiest person, but we will be happy.  Money can’t buy happiness, but if money is used correctly, we can be happy.

Week10--Dream Big Dreams

We were sent here to earth to strive to become. What are we striving to become? The answer to this question is different for every person.  For me, striving is reaching for something, working hard to attain the goal you have set for yourself.  It also means to keep going, keep progressing, even when you feel you are not moving or progressing.  So, what am I striving to become? Over the last few months I have been striving to be a student that succeeds, a better mother and wife that makes time for her family, a more loyal worker at my job that stops the gossip and is positive, and a better disciple of Christ.  

Some days I feel very overwhelmed and feel that I can’t accomplish everything, and my striving to become comes to a halt.  I often feel I have “two wolves” battling inside me and depending on the day, determines which wolf wins.  From the old Cherokee parable Jim Ritchie shared, “What you feed grows and what you starve dies.” (Jim Ritchie, “Your Emotional Fingerprint Video”) Taylor Richards said, "Do not over underestimate yourself.  You can do it.  You can accomplish the goals and the dreams that you set for yourself.  And if you involve the Lord you can do the impossible." (Taylor Richards, Think Big video) I need to learn not to be so hard on myself. To learn from my mistakes, have confidence, set goals and achieve them.  I also want to remember that if I involve the Lord, I can do anything.

Another thing I learned this week and want to remember is when it comes to choosing who we work with, choose people well, people who will no matter what have your back.  In my reading of A Hero’s Journey, it says, “Much of our long-term happiness comes from strong relationships, but such relationships require a deliberate investment of time and thought.” (Robert Sirico, Jeff Sandefer, “A Field Guide for the Hero’s Journey”, Acton Institute, 2012) Be smart in who you pick to work with you. People that build you up and support you, are kind, love what they do, and will have your back.  If you want to work with someone like this, you also need to be that kind of person.

Week 9--Disciple Leadership

How do we become great leaders?  How do we gain people's trust to let us lead them?  This week I learned that one of the important aspects of leadership is delegation.  I don't own a business, but I do run a household.  Delegating is hard for me. I want to make sure that if something needs to be done that it gets done correctly.  I give my children chores, but struggle with letting them do them fully on their own. Delegation in my calling is another place I have a hard time letting go.  I just figure I will do it all myself.  Through the readings this week, I learned that I need to let go of some of my control and let others learn through doing. 

"Tempting as this may be, it is impossible to build an effective organization without delegating important tasks to talented and capable people.  It's the only way to make a grand vision a reality." ("A Message to Garcia", Acton Foundation, 2008)  If I am going to start up my own company, I can't so everything alone. I will need to delegate so I had better learn now how to delegate to talented and capable people.

When I was interviewing my friend this week about a business she started up with her parents, she mentioned to me that one of the reasons she thinks her parent's restaurant isn't prospering is because they don't delegate.  They don't trust the employees to carry on if they aren't there, so they never leave.  This has been so draining on her parents. From this example, I see that not delegating can cause huge stresses that don't need to be present.

I want to learn how to lead with the small "L" leadership, by example, vision, and love. I think I can start learning this leadership in my home, which will extend to my business, by being a good example to my children, teaching them how to contribute to the family by doing chores and loving them and teaching them to love and support each other. (Kim B. Clark, "Leadership with a Small "L", Brigham Young University--Idaho Commencement, December 2007)

Week 8--Overcoming Challenges

What a powerful lesson this week.  What was the last thing you struggled with and what was your reaction to this struggle? Did you give up because it was too difficult? Did you persevere, allowing yourself to grow?  This lesson on overcoming challenges made me look deep inside myself.  How many times have I taken the easy way out of things? How many times have I given up because I was too embarrassed, too lazy, or too scared?  When was the last time I did finish something I set out to do?  Lately I have been wondering if finishing school is what I really want to do.  As I look at the classes I must take to finish my degree, it frightens me. I set a goal for myself over twenty-five years ago to get an education. My self-doubt kicks into high gear and I start to second guess myself.  Am I smart enough to accomplish this goal? Do I have what it takes to be dedicated to finishing?

“Excellence does not come easily or quickly—an excellent education does not. . . It is simply a truism that nothing very valuable can come without significant sacrifice and effort and patience on our part.

“You will face some delays and disappointments at this formative time in your life and feel that no one else in the history of mankind has ever had your problems or faced those difficulties.  And when some of those challenges come you will have the temptation common to us all to say, “This task is too hard.  The burden is too heavy.  The path is too long.” And so you decide to quit, simply to give up.

“But in life’s most crucial and telling tasks, my plea is to stick with it, to persevere, to hang in and hang on, and to reap your reward.

“I am asking you this morning not to give up “for ye are laying the foundation of a great work.” That “great work” is you—your life, your future, the very fulfillment of your dreams. That “great work” is what, with effort and patience and God’s help, you can become.” (Jeffrey R. Holland, “However Long and Hard the Road”, Brigham Young University Speeches, 1982-83)

This quote from Elder Holland put things into perspective for me. Yes, I am older. Yes, education is hard. But excellence doesn’t come easy. I have to work for those things I want. Do I really want to accomplish the goal I set twenty-five years ago? Yes! I need to remember that I will struggle, but God will be there to help me if I let Him.  I need to persevere through the tough classes and reap my reward of accomplishing my goal along with building my confidence that I can do hard things.

Week 7--Moving Forward With a Driving Passion

I found this week's learning very interesting.  Guy Kawasaki's gave some great advise about money and passion in his video, Passion vs. Money. He said that the goals we set should be about making the world a better place.  If your goals are set in this manner and you change the world, you will make money.  He said, "Money isn't all that it's cracked up to be."  With money comes more responsibilities. And just because we have money, doesn't mean we will be happy.  Finding our passion is what drives us.  It is what makes us get up in the morning to face the challenges of the day.  I liked being reminded that passion, doing what I enjoy, is more important than making more money doing something I dread.

I also learned about the 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen R. Covey.  His goals are:

• Be Proactive
• Begin with the end in mind
• Put first things first
• Think win/win
• Seek first to understand, then to be understood
• Synergize
• Sharpen the saw

When we work on Covey's seven habits, we achieve private and public victories as we strive to better ourselves and improve our communication and relationships with others.  I feel that as I work on the habit of beginning with the end in mind, my life will have meaning.  I will have a direction to head and goals to achieve. I like how Covey says to visualize what people will say at your funeral, at your 50th wedding anniversary, ant at your retirement. What do you want them to be saying about you?  Using these visualizations, we should write a mission statement that focuses on "what you want to be (character), do (contributions and achievements) and on the values or principles upon which being and doing are based." (Stephen R. Covey, "The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People", http://www.summaries.com)  I am excited to take the time to visualize just exactly what I want my end to be and how I am going to get there.